Wednesday, November 26, 2008

hilarious craigslist post

today i came upon an actual craigslist posting (thru a friend) that had me and steve DYING! this is exactly what it said, i swear i didnt add/change anything!
Ferocious attack kitten is available for adoption to any home willing to accept him.
This destructive kitty has been trained as a proud warrior and will fiercely defend your house, even against you. Well-trained since 10-weeks of age to attack anything in his presence, he will protect your family from evil things, including the following:
* insects
* other trained attack kittens
* babies
* toilet paper
* anything under a blanket
* unwanted house guests
* paper bags
* floor rugs
* Chuck Norris
* Feet.
Great with children (assuming you don't like the children). Probably best used for professional catfighting. He is housebroken, but only because he wants to be. This attack cat has trained himself to seek out his food anywhere you hide it and rip the bag open to feed himself, great for those who travel extensively. Also trained to drink water out of toilet bowls and dishwater from items in the sink. Knows how to open some doors. He will find you wherever you hide. Neutered (trust me, you wont want to him to procreate). Has not been declawed, but you'll figure that out really fast. Understands and responds to a variety of vulgar and profane verbal commands. Has a very soft and furry belly, like a teddy bear - however he will bite your face if you try to touch it. Willing to accept trades. Potential adopters must have experience with trained attack-kittens... please be prepared to show scars. For the love of God, someone please take this thing out of my house.
LMAO! LOL! hahahahaha! if only we could think of something this clever to get mango a new home! i love funny people...
hope everyone has a fabulous thanksgiving! im planning on devouring my very own pumpkin pie along with a huge tub of cool whip! gotta love a holiday that youre supposed to be fatty on.

3 comments:

Kristen said...

One of Anders's mice (Blizzard) kept on attacking the other one (Popcorn) to the point of blood. Anyway, we let Blizzard become a wild mouse. Ta da! Problem solved.

Annie Pennington said...

My favorite part is how this kitten can even fight off the ever mighty Chuck Norris!! LMAO!!!!!!! Funny stuff!! Happy Turkey Day!!

The Potter Family said...

That is fricken AWESOME!! I love it!! ha ha ha!