it seemed like such a good idea

i always make little resolutions each year but normally become frustrated and give up towards the end of january. i really HATE that i always do this, so this year i promised myself to set smaller goals, and then progress from there. here are a few things i WILL change this year and hopefully continue with in the future:

*be more organized. i have always been pretty organized for the most part, but have definitely slacked since we moved here to germany. i used to blame it on the lack of stores that carry organizing items and our small home out here, but need to not use that as an excuse anymore. although i am really really excited about going back to the land of targets and walmarts! it will be nice to have a place for everything once again. i'm sick of our bedroom acting as our storage room! its depressing to go to bed and seeing piles and piles of papers and crap taking up space on the floor. this drives me CRAZY! also, our storage area beneath us is INSANELY messy and i have been having nightmares about it. its so overwhelming to go down there and see all the things that need to be taken care of. i want to get it all organized, donate items, sell things before our movers come as i don't want to take this mess with us to alaska.

*cook healthier meals. (this makes steve groan as he isnt into eating wheat pasta, brown rice, and wheat flour like i do) i have good intentions and have a ton of healthy cookbooks. its time to use them! i also just purchased jerry seinfeld's wifes cookbook "deceptively delicious" and have been very interested in trying some of her recipes. she makes all of these vegetable puree's and hides them in her children's foods! this is what we need as brynn and steve aren't too cool with eating their veggies. some of her recipes sound a little crazy to me (sweet potato puree in hot cocoa!?) but i'm willing to try them. i don't cook horrible foods normally, but need to be more consistent in the meals i do make.

*become more spiritual. i have been such a slacker in doing the things i know i need to do to become more in tune with the spirit. i used to blame it on being stuck down in primary but hello! i am so to blame. i don't make the time and have really noticed how much it is hurting me. i have such great days when i start them off by praying, and reading my scriptures and am frustrated with myself for not doing this consistently! i don't have my priorities straight.

*run. i have always wanted to be a runner (nothing crazy. i'm not about making 6 minute miles here people!) as one, it will help me loose the rest of this disgusting bread dough belly and two, it makes me feel so strong and capable of anything. i have always been so envious of those who can do half marathons/marathons (ahem, kristen, janae and kiesha) and can live to tell it! i would like to complete a half marathon someday, and MAYBE do a marathon. i have to see if i can survive the 13.1 miles first before i agree to go for the marathon. i just don't know how people can go for 3-4 hour long runs!

the base had a new year, new you 5k run this afternoon at noon and i had been planning on running in it for a few days now. of corse, it snowed yesterday (not as bad as it has been in seattle and cache valley thank goodness!) and was butt friggin cold this morning. still, when i woke up this morning, i promised myself i wouldn't wimp out due to the nasty weather and continue with my goal. so i dug around in our winter clothes and found an old warm headband to protect my ears. i couldn't find any light weight gloves and decided that my hoodie would be ok to keep my hands warm (bad idea). shelly said that she wouldn't mind watching brynn for me in the mothers room at the gym, so i was relieved to know that she was in good hands. so i head to the front lobby, and there is no one else there wanting to run! yah...i was the ONLY one! i tried recruiting a few people to run with me, including steve's boss, but everyone laughed and said it was too cold to go outside (it around 20 degrees). i almost wussed out, but knew i would regret it so i signed up and waited for the lady to start her stop watch. she thought i was crazy to run outside and gave me a few pointers on areas to watch as there were patches of black ice along the way. hooray. just what i need, a broken ankle. 3.1 miles is not hard at all, but it is hard in the COLD! i'm such an idiot for not running outside for a few days to prep my lungs to the cold. running on a treadmill for 3+ miles is cake when you're in a warm building. my lungs were screaming at me for a while in the beginning.

i did fine the first 10 minutes but then my ipod died on me. this really pissed me off as i swore it was fully charged! i'm all about listening to techno and awesome music to keep me pumped (and i had just added a new podcast to my list that i was excited to hear) and distracted while i run, so not listening to anything just about killed me. but i guess the sounds of the f-16's and traffic helped me stay somewhat distracted. my hands were totally numb and tingly when i reached the turn around point, and i was cursing myself for not grabbing the thick snowboarding gloves that i saw earlier in the morning (although it would have looked RIDICULOUS, i didn't care). but i kept on and eventually made it back to the warm gym, face all wind burned and completely frozen. the lady who started me was shocked to see me back so soon (she was probably thinking a fatty like me took an hour to do a 5k) and questioned that i actually ran the full 3.1 miles! so i was eager to know what my time was as i thought for sure i took longer then 37 minutes (my goal was to get below 40). i ran it in 33 minutes and 15 seconds! that was so awesome to hear as not listening to music really screwed up my rhythm and i was so sure that i took forever to get back. now i know to all you fast runners, this time is LAME (average mile a little over 11 minutes) but i don't care. i don't care about speed. all i care about is finishing and getting those endorphins baby!

plus, i want to be in GREAT shape when we get pregnant next so i can continue working out during my pregnancy and not take 2 years to loose all the baby weight! it was so depressing for me to not lose it as fast as everyone else around me was. if you people have secrets that i don't know about, tell me!